I am sorry that I did not get on here yesterday. It was a difficult day. Many things related to this difficult road made for a rough day.

So back to my story, We had a short engagement and sometimes it was rocky. Jerry drank more as time wore on than I wanted him to. He would sometimes drink at least a six pack of beer a day, sometimes more. People would tell me that he drank too much but I just figured that he would stop after we got married, that it was not a problem, that he drank for fun. I would drink a wine cooler or two with him and also got drunk a few times so I didn't see anything wrong in him drinking like he did.

One time however during our dating period he disappeared for three days. He did not tell anyone where he was going. I had gone to his house to wait for him so we could go do something, I can't remember what it was now. All I remember is that he did not show up. I called his mom to see if she knew where he was but she did not. When he did not show up the next day we were both worried. After the second night his mom went to Montrose, the town where he used to live, and found him and his brother at a motel. Jerry was drunk and did not come home but she really chewed him out. She had also taken her husband with her. He was ill and dying but he wanted to go.

I was very upset at that and also as our relationship progressed I worried about the drinking. But the wedding plans were made, I had my invitations and my dress. I could not back out. I also was ready to move out on my own. I did not want to live in my dads home any longer for many reasons that could actually fill another blog.

I thought about backing out of the wedding but decided to move forward with it and try to make it work. I loved Jerry very much and hoped that he would love me enough to change for me, for us, because of his deep love for me. I was only 20 years old, ready to be a wife and eventually a mom. So on October 15, 1983 I became Mrs. Jerry Miller.

That's all for now, I will say more soon.